April 22, 2014
The Kickstarter fundraising campaign is 66% funded and—with only nine days to go—Dana Linn has been pushed from the driver’s seat and ‘Golene’ has taken over…
“I, darlin,’ am a figment of someone’s imagination. I live in her head, and she has written a script around me. She has made me a parody of a Southern woman who is stuck in the 60s. I have a towering blonde beehive, of which I am immensely proud, and I use a can of hairspray on it daily to keep it soaring to great heights. You know what we say in the south, ‘The higher the hair, the closer to God.’
“Well, it’s true. My black cat-eye glasses come around a corner before the rest of this here ol’ body does. And said body is swanked out in clingy animal prints in every possible color polyester comes in. I am looking through those cat-eye glasses at the near side of 60. And, I am a Professional Beautician, with my own shop, my own gaggle of customers and two employees. Two! We live in her mind now, but we hope to live in the world of pretend on a real stage someday. (That’s about as clear as mud, ain’t it?)
“Living in someone’s mind means I am privy to her thoughts. She may have made me up, but residing where I do shows me more information than—frankly—I need. Many of those thoughts bouncing around her mind are about as useful as a pocket on a cow. Right now, she’s trying to raise some lettuce to pay a composer and to produce the show she imagined us all into existence with.
“Sometimes her mind is on hyperdrive, with thoughts of how to promote it all. Then her head swirls with exhilaration every time someone donates. When the rare day passes that no one contributes, her gray matter actually makes a grimace. How ’bout that! I tell ya, I’ve seen it all. Instead of pouting, though, she does this thing where she sits quietly, and fills her heart with an attitude of gratitude for all those folks who have helped her during this roller coast of a month. Then, she’s calm again, bless her little fidgety heart.
“Yes, I am just someone’s imagination. But you can help me live. It’s kinda like clapping your hands when you were a kid so Tinkerbell could come alive again. Instead of clapping your hands, though, tease your hair up to its highest heights, sashay on over to your computer and go to this link. You have my word of honor that you will giggle. And that’s something—coming from a figment of someone’s imagination, you gotta admit!